The Drawbacks of Being Tall

I admit it, I'm a tall person. At 6'6, I'm far above the average of 5'10 for U.S. males (and I while researching this statistic, I found out that the average height for a U.S. female is 5'4, which surprised me). It's definitely nice being a tall person, but it also has its drawbacks. 

The one biggest peeve I have is people saying "Wow, you're really tall." Then they stare at you like you're an animal at the zoo. 

"Ok, everyone!! Bring yo' kids, bring yo' wife, and bring yo' husband 'cuz we goin' to the Nathan exhibit at the zoo!!" No, it does not work like that. I'm not an animal to stare at and take pictures of. I'm just another human being blessed/cursed with excessive height. (I will say that picture pretty closely resembles me). Maybe I should charge an admission fee like they do at the zoo to see "The Nathan Exhibit."

Ok, now about the nicknames. Nicknames are not a bad thing. I've been called everything from "Jolly Green Giant," "Giraffe," "Stretch," "Big," "IceMan" (though that has nothing to do with being tall).

I have no problem with the nicknames. Nicknames are great. They're any easy way of remembering someone without having to remember their name. But please, check with the person before you call them something. I've had numerous people come up with a nickname for me that I had never heard before that I took offense to. So, just check, and if I say yes, by all means call me that. Put that as my name in your phone. Leave me notes with that nickname. Yell my nickname in a crowd. But just check with me.

Ok, the tall jokes. They're fine. I mean, you got blonde jokes, you got fat jokes, you got black jokes, you got white jokes. It's going to happen. So, I don't worry about it. The only one I hate: "How's the weather up there?" It is so overused, I get it at least once a day. Do not ever use it. Ever. If you do use it, be prepared for my answer: I will spit at you and say it is raining.

Do I hit my head on stuff? Yes, I do. I have hit my head on doorways. I've hit my head on exit signs (particularly the one in David John lobby that I never remember to duck my head for). I've hit my head on the ceiling. I've hit tree branches. I've hit my head on the backboard on the basketball hoop (just once though). I do not fit in cars, buses, airplanes, minivans. I do not fit in my own bed. I do not fit on some roller coasters (and a lot of stories come to mind about that)    :( . And yes I've had this happen to me.

 

Not fun.

Several other drawbacks: Never being able to fit under the piano; Never being able to fit in an organ; Having a large foot size that stores never carry (actually, my cousin has more of that problem, I'm doing pretty ok); Love (I'll get to that later); I could probably think of a few more. 

So I've ranted on about the drawbacks of being tall. Yes, there are some bright sides. It helps in basketball (though I would much rather have a fast team than a tall team, trust me). Yes, it's really nice to be able to see people over large crowds. It's actually one of the best things about being tall. Yes, it's a really good conversation starter when you meet a girl.

Ok, now that I've come to the topic of girls, I will give my spiel about love as a tall guy. Love is tough to come by as a tall guy. Ok, hold on, before you start a riot and and say "No, Nathan!!! Girls love tall guys!!!!" let me explain myself. Yes, girls do love tall guys. Girls much prefer a 6'3 guy over a 5'3 guy. Girls feel secure around tall guys. But there comes a certain point where girls suddenly believe that a guy is "too tall." After years of research, experiments, and observation, I'm ready to announce my results that most girl's height cut-off is 6'4. At that point, any guy taller than that is deemed "too tall." Yes, guys can be too tall for a girl. Unfair, yes perhaps. But I guess that comes with being tall. I've had girls reject me because I'm too tall. Sadly, I have been victim of the "too tall for me" phrase. *Sigh* 

It's much harder for women that are tall. My sister is a freshman in high school and six feet tall. Poor thing, having to deal with immature little boys that are all shorter than her. But I don't have much experience being a tall girl, so I'll leave it at that.

So there you have it folks. Those are (primarily) the drawbacks of being tall. Don't get me wrong, I love being tall. But as with every good thing, it also has its drawbacks. I'd much rather be tall than short.

My friends, God bless.